Taking this job (ok, I had NO choice) was a BRILLIANT decision pmsl
It has EVERYTHING you could ask for:
Salary - with overtime, I COULD be looking a five figures this year (pass me the Porsche* lmao)
Work to do - NONE lol - only ONE person has come into the shop since I started. And I told him we were shut lol. He believed me!!!
HONEYS - AMAZING spot for a shop, with a BIG window. I am just staring at honeys walking past ALL DAY. Good timing too - schools are back lol MMMM school uniform lmao
Area Manager - BIT of a cock, but hardly ever visits. We have developed a DEGREE of trust too. He came in the other day and caught me in the store room watching the Pursuit of Happiness and I was crying (do NOT judge me on this until you've seen the movie). In order to cover my tracks I CLAIMED that I was crying cos I'd just heard that Nan was dead. This was and IS very awkward since I live with my Nan and she drops me off and picks up up every day.
This was a POTENTIAL problem, but last night I snuck out in the night and coloured in Nan's car windows with a sharpie. Now whenever she drops me off in her Audi TT I just say it's my NEW gf lol. They will NEVER find out.
Feel a bit bad, mind, but you never know, she MAY die soon anyway
RIP rofl
*probs not TOP of the range
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6 comments:
When you get the sack from this job you should become a bra salesman. It's the ideal occupation for a colossal tit.
Or a Tampax salesman - something fit for cunts
Bluckbuster eh?
Look what you did:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-11397020
I'm impressed by the lack of abusive email & uncontrolled sexism in this blog. Just the ridiculous overuse of childish web slang acronyms to get rid of & then it'll be readable. Not yet funny, but hope springs eternal...
Ideal job for Julian - a condom tester - just the job for a prick
FFS
I can haz bottom cheese ja?
Massive winky!!!
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