See you in 2009!!!!! lol

I am going to see Nan for Christmas, so i will NOT be blogging until then.
She has CANCELLED her broadband subscription since I moved out :(

lmao

OWL Update

Update on my quest to remove ALL trace of owls from the internet.
It's NOT going well.
These owl pushers can be VERY stubborn:
Here's a response to one of the MANY emails I sent out:


***Original Message***
From: Julian Meteor [mailto:julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk]
To: contact@manyhoots.org
Subject: Owl ISSUES


I have reason to believe you are an owl pusher and your run THIS site - http://www.manyhoots.org/

I for one HAPPEN to think it is VERY distasteful.

Please remove your website by 5pm LATEST

Gives me the RIGHT shivers.

Let me know; either way

Julian


RE: Owl ISSUES‏
From: Pete Donovan (contact@manyhoots.org)
Sent: 15 December 2008 19:18:42
To: 'Julian Meteor' (julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk)


Sorry to upset you, but if you don’t like the site please don’t go on it then, what do you mean by owl pusher anyway?I thought it gave a lot of information to people that wanted to learn more respectfully


RE: Owl ISSUES‏
From: Julian Meteor (julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk)
Sent: 18 December 2008 11:01:04
To: Owl - do NOT tell mummy (contact@manyhoots.org)

Are you going to take it down or not?

Can you just let me know either way?


Subject: OWL ISSUEs‏
From: Pete Donovan (contact@manyhoots.org)
Sent: 16 December 2008 20:48:24
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk

Hello Julian.

In answer to your question take it down let me know, I am sorry to disappoint you but I cannot do that as i feel that many hoots does a good job in helping a variety of birds back to the wild, look closer on the many hoots pages and you will see pictures of the birds they have helped.

Anyway aren’t you the Julian who went to Devonport High School for boys in 1986, and did you go on to chef school and went in the merchant navy as a chef on the ******** cruises, if it is I think I knew you. Anyway Julian No This Kestrel was a wild bird that had to have its leg taken off, it is now fine and is looked after by the team at many hoots. We will not close the site for anyone that gets upset we do a good job please take the time and look at all the pages on the site and not just the two you looked at , I do not wish to upset you but please consider all the wild life we help that you do not even know about

Take care Julian, with respect the team at ManyHoots.

Anyone for tennis???? lol

From: Julian Meteor [mailto:julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk]
Sent: 18 December 2008 10:56
To: jenny.storey@queensclub.co.uk
Subject: Queens Club Membership Query

Dear Jenny,

I have just moved to London and I am a MAD KEEN tennis player lol!

I see your club is the most local to my new flat and I am DESPERATE to join in time for next summer, but I wanted to first ask a discreet question as there is nothing on the website to aid me.
The name "Queens" implies the members MIGHT not be, well normal/straight. I have NOTHING against them, but I need to check cos it would have all sorts of implications in terms of changing facilities, social etc.

I trust you understand and look forward to your response; either way,

Julian


Subject: The Queens Club
Date: Thu, 18 Dec 2008 12:34:11 +0000
From: James.Herbert-Brown@queensclub.co.uk
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk


Dear Julian

My colleague Jenny has forwarded your email regarding membership at The Queen’s Club and the following 2 paragraphs from the website should clearly explain the history of the Club and why the Club is known as ‘The Queen’s Club’.

‘The Queen's Club, established in 1886, was the first multipurpose sports complex ever to be built, anywhere in the world. The Club was named after Queen Victoria, its first patron, and is widely renowned as one of the premier Lawn Tennis and Racquets clubs in the world. The Club has hosted as many as twenty-five different sporting activities and, as well as lawn tennis, has been the scene for such varied sports as ice-skating, baseball, athletics and rugby.
Throughout its history, the Club has been an exceptional sporting venue, and today hosts the world famous Stella Artois Championships, the World Rackets Championships and leading Real Tennis events, including the British Open. The Club boasts 28 outdoor Lawn Tennis courts, of which 12 are arguably the finest grass courts in the world, 8 indoor Lawn Tennis courts, 2 Real Tennis courts, 2 Rackets courts, 3 squash courts and a gymnasium. The Club also offers excellent hospitality facilities, including an elegant restaurant, cafe, museum, and President's Room - all located within the Members' Clubhouse. The overall setting is both tranquil and charming. This, together with the array of racquets sports available, is why The Queen's Club remains one of the most coveted memberships in the country’.
The Queen’s Club is a private members club and candidates who wish to apply for membership of the Club should know two existing members who are willing to support the application and for your information the current Full membership waiting list is a minimum of 1 year.

If you require further information please contact the Membership Office.

Regards

James


James Herbert-Brown
Membership & Marketing Manager

The Queen's Club
Palliser Road
West Kensington
London
W14 9EQ

Telephone: 020 **** ****
Fax: 020 **** ****

RE: The Queens Club‏
From: Julian Meteor (julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk)
Sent: 18 December 2008 13:51:59
To: James.Herbert-Brown@queensclub.co.uk


Hi Jamie,

Thanks a lot for this. Just to reiterate, I have NOTHING against them, but I had to check because I would imagine if it was just for homosexuals, the standard of tennis would surely be compromised; if you know what I mean. Arthur Ashe? I hear you say... well, he is just one of thousands of tennis champions - there is ALWAYS an exception.

Anyway, it's not an issue. How much is membership and does it matter if the two members I know are female and HATE each other?

Can you let me know?

Thanks,

J

***No Reply***

London > Plymouth

Things move FAST in London. I looked at a studio flat in Kilburn (FAR more central than my previous NIGHTMARE in Milton Keynes) and decided to move in STRAIGHT away.
Moving my stuff did NOT take long.
My observations on London so far:
1. You are NOT allowed to talk on public transport. I HAD been warned about this, but it was PISSING down outside, so when we got on the bus I just turned to the person next to me (old chap, LOTS of tattoos) and said "nice day outside lol"!!!
Not EVEN a smile from him. IT WAS A JOKE!!!!!! Lighten UP!!!!
2. There are NO trees. Therefore NO, you know...! lol. NO BIRDS! Of ANY type.!!!!! BEST NEWS EVER!!
3. You canNOT swim in the Thames. EVEN in a wetsuit.
4. No-one talks to you, APART from policemen (when you are caught trying to do a couple of widths of the Thames to stay fit)
5. Getting a job here is going to be a CINCH!!!! lmao
I got up EXTRA early this morning to study the COMMON traits of the working people of London. Do they walk differently? Do they ALL read funny-coloured newspapers? Do I HAVE to own a suit if I am going to find work?
What did I find? I found that every other worker is a WOMAN!!!!!! lol
Even HONEYS can get jobs!!! If THEY can, I DEFO can rofl

Moving to London was the BEST thing I've done. EVER.

NOT letting bygones be bygones (until they are bygones)

In hindsight I SHOULD have put the disappointment of yesterday's gazumping (or nearest rental equivalent) behind me, but Julian Lennon Meteor will NOT tolerate being mucked around.

________________________________________
From: Julian Meteor
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008

Mr Bradley,

Your friend Hugo has massively let me down. First he told me I could have the flat, then he said I couldn't and now he said he has rented it out to some random (but has produced NO proof of this). I don't really have time for his stupid games. Please can you sort this mess out? I have given notice on my flat in North London (Milton Keynes) based on what Hugo/you had PROMISED me. I hardly think it's fair to withdraw the flat now. Spencer will go bananas as I have already confirmed use of the band's van.

Sorry to get you involved but your "mate" seems to be ingoring me.

Let me know ASAP.

Julian

________________________________________
From: billbrady242@hotmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Whoa there! All I did is pass you the details. The rest is between you and this guy Hugo. I have sent him your email asking him to sort this out but there's no point in having a go at me, I can't do anything else about it.


________________________________________
From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
CC: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Brady/Hugo,

Between you guys please do me the smallest service and SORT YOUR STORIES OUT. Don't for a moment think I don't know what is going on - it stinks I can tell you. I bet you were using my interest in the flat to play against other people to raise the level of rent. I think that's DISGUSTING. I came to you guys in GOOD FAITH and you are colluding to defraud me of a place to live.

Thanks; for nothing.

I HOPE you will both reconsider.

Let me know; ASAP.

Julian.


________________________________________
From: billbrady242@hotmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Julian -- I can assure I have no idea what you are on about. All I did is send out an email request that I got from a mate. That is the end of my participation in this process, aside from passing on your email address. Everything that has gone on from that point is between you and Hugo.

Now, I suggest that you get YOUR story straight before you go around accusing me of something that I have no involvement in whatsoever.


Thanks.

________________________________________
From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
CC: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008

Bill,

You KNOW I am NOT happy with this, but I will LEAVE you with a thought and let's hope this is the END of this sorry episode:

It is NO WONDER the last person left when you are such a DISHONEST landlord.

Julian

PS I was NOT happy about living with Higo anyway. The LAST German I lived with used to piss in the shower.


________________________________________
From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
CC: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Any news?


From: billbrady242@hotmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Julian,

I can not be any clearer about this and you seem to be under the impression I'm messing you around. This is NOT my flat but is Hugo's. I have nothing to do with this except for letting a few people on the London Argyle Supporters loop know about a flat for rent. I'm not the landlord here, Hugo is. I can not help you out with any of this as it is NOTHING TO DO WITH ME!!!!!!!

If I get any other emails on this matter, with the exception of an apology from you as I have done absolutely nothing wrong, then they will be ignored. I suggest you have a really long think about this and realise that what I am saying might just be true and you may have actually made a mistake.

William


________________________________________
From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


I can NOT believe this.

So I am supposed to believe you sold the flat OVER NIGHT to Hugo? Even though you 'claim' you barely even know him?

BULLSHIT.

YOU should be the one apologising and YOU KNOW IT.

See you in court; either way.


From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: spencerfairbrother@live.co.uk
Subject: FW: Flat For Rent
Date: 17 December 2008


Spence, THIS is the buffoon who is responsible for the van bookings. Do you think we can get our money back?


From: Spencer Fairbrother
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
CC: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: FW: Flat For Rent
Date: 17 December 2008


Hi Hugo,

I'm not the sort to cry over spilt milk, as it were, but I wish to register an extreme disappointment with you. I spent £80 on hiring a van which I no longer need. Please, just for a moment, consider how you would feel in this situation.

Yours,

Spencer


From: billbrady242@hotmail.com
To: spencerfairbrother@live.co.uk
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Look, I'm am really tired of saying this... I have nothing to do with this. My name is William (or Bill). I passed on an email from a friend of a friend who was looking for his flat to be rent. That person is called Hubert (Hugo in the emails). That is where my participation in this ended.


Since then, Julian has had a number of email conversations with Hubert (not me) about Hubert's flat (not mine). I have no idea why Julian thinks that I have any other involvement in this.

I have explained on a number of occasions but he doesn't seem to understand. I AM A TOTALLY DIFFERENT PERSON FROM THIS HUBERT GUY AND HAVE HAD NO INVOLVEMENT BEYOND PASSING ON THE ORIGINAL EMAIL.

If Julian fails to understand that then I cannot do much about it but the fact remains, I have nothing to do with this and am bloody sick of explaining it.

This ends now. Julian needs to take up his beef with Hubert and stop hassling me.


William


From: spencerfairbrother@live.co.uk
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Do you have Hugo's contact details?


-----Original Message-----
From: William Brady
To: Spencer Fairbrother
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Hi Spencer,

I only have his email address which is hubertvan********@gmail.com. I have not met the guy as was passed this through a mate. I think he lives in Amsterdam.

As you seem to understand my position can you please try and explain it to Julian too? I'm not entirely sure why he doesn't believe me but I think coming from you he may listen a little more. I don't want there to be any bad feeling about this all as it's me that seems to be getting the brunt of this. I know it must be frustrating from his/your side but taking it out on me as an innocent person in all this isn't really the solution.


Thanks.


From: spencerfairbrother@live.co.uk
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


William,

You only gave me one address.
I will need both Hugo's and Hubert's addresses if I am to get to the bottom of this and recoup my £80.

I am not short of a bob, but it's the principal.

Spencer

PS I take it you are happy to settle on £26.66 each if the others are too? Not much, really, when split three ways.


From: billbrady242@hotmail.com
To: spencerfairbrother@live.co.uk
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 16 December 2008


Spencer,

There is only 1 person -- Hubert. But during some of the conversations I think his name got confused and he got called Hugo but it is definitely just 1 person, Hubert.

I'm not willing to pay anything. I have tried to explain many times that I had no interaction with any of this. I simply passed on an email at the beginning of the process and then was not involved at all until I got a crappy email from Julian shouting at me to sort it out because it had been let to someone else. I don't see why I therefore should have to pay for something that is nothing to do with me.

I'm really sorry, but this is something that needs to be sorted out with Julian, you and Hubert. Surely the attached copy of the original emails shows this?

As far as I'm concerned, that is the end of my dealings with any of this and I don't expect to see any more emails about this matter.

Thanks.

William


***The End***

Are ALL Londoners W***ers?

NOT happy. My plan to move into MORE cetral London location has hit a blip.
The ONLY good thing to come of it is that me and Spence are getting on again.
When I have bezzies like him back home, I sometimes wonder why I BOTHER trying to make it (whatever THAT means lol) in London.
Is EVERYONE in the capital a TOTAL ass?

From: billbrady242@hotmail.com
Subject: Flat For Rent
To: *25 Addresses Removed*
Date: 14 December 2008

Hi everyone,

A mate of mine has a flat for rent in Islington close to Tufnell Park/Archway tubes. If anyone's interested, or you know of anyone that might be interested, follow the link below to Gumtree.com:

http://www.gumtree.com/london/&^/*&*&*&*.html

Thanks.

WB

________________________________________

From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: billbrady242@hotmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 14 December 2008


Bradley,

Is this flat STILL available? I cannot access Gumtree. Please can you forward my email to him.

Best

JM


Date: 14 December 2008
From: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: Flat available Tufnell/Dartmouth Park


Dear Julian,

I hope you are well.

A mutual contact provided me your details (Bill Brady from London Argyle Supporters). I understand you may be seeking an apartment to rent. I have a privately let apartment which will become available from 22nd December, when our tennant of 2.5 years moves away to New York.
The apartment details are attached, however if you have any questions or wish to arrange a viewing, just let me know. Likewise feel free to text me on 0031 *** *** *** and I can either call or SMS you back.
The apartment is near Hamstead Heath as well as all the Tube and Bus connections of Tufnell Park and Archway stations. Postcode is N19 ***

Thanks Julian.

Looking forward to hearing from you.

With kind regards,

Hubert Van ********


Date: 14 December 2008
From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent



Hi Hubert!

I need MORE details lol

Can you let me know; either way?

Julian


Date: 14 December 2008
From: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: Re: Flat available Tufnell/Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***


Hi Julian,

Could I get your mobile number, or SMS me via your own?

I am going to be offline though we can arrange a viewing to suit you if you, if you're interested?

Thank you,

Hubert


From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Flat For Rent
Date: 14 December 2008


Hugo,

I am a little concerned about the price. Is it negotiable? I suspect I am not the ONLY person feeling the effects of the credit crunch! Also, would you say this is a "lucky" flat in terms of getting the girls back? I'm on a fantastic run at the moment and would HATE for it to come to an end because of YOUR flat. I would have sent you an SMS (whatever THAT is!!) but I am out of credit until payday. I ALWAYS run out of money!!! LOL!!!! In light of that, I assume you do not NEED a deposit as a friend recommended me to you? I would LOVE to arrange a viewing.

Please let me know; either way; by 12noon (GMT).

Kind regards,

JM



________________________________________
From: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: Re: Flat available Tufnell/Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 14 December 2008


Hi Julian,

(Its Hubert by the way and an SMS is a text message, though I think you figured that out :)

Lots of points there... let me try and tackle! Seriously though, yes a deposit is needed (always) and the cost is actually reasonable already (the rent hasn't been raised in two and half years already).

If you still wish to arrange make a viewing let me know ASAP and/or text me on 0031 *** *** ***, when you have credit.

Also, I shall be in London this weekend so perhaps can view with you on Saturday?

Thanks a lot. Speak later.

Hubert


________________________________________
From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: Re: Flat available Tufnell/Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 14 December 2008


This all sound ok.
Tell me more about YOU. I NEED to know about you if we are going to live together and hang out three times a week.
Are you a good wingman?
Record meet-to-shag time?
Out of ten what do you think of Leona Lewis? (this gives me an idea of your standards)
What score are you on for the year? (Honeys you have done)

I will pay a deposit RELUCTANTLY and MAY be able to look round on Saturday. Can you pick me up from the station? (Euston). I will give you petrol money.

Let me know; either way,

Julian


From: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 622 863 616.
Date: 14 December 2008


Hi Julian,

The appartment is for rent as it is. We will not be living together - Further info attached.
Also, would like to learn about you too. It is after all my apartment you'll be renting :)

Thanks

Hubert


From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 14 December 2008


Don't worry about ME, Hubo lol

I do NOT do drugs and I ALWAYS put my condoms in the bin rofl

I will NOT make a mess.

Can I move in? And can you pick me up from the station? Do you have a big car?

Let me know; etc

Julian


________________________________________
From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 14 December 2008


Any news?


From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.


Is your studio still available?


Date: 14 December 2008
From: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: Re: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.


Hi Julian,

I presume you don't wish to move in :)
Thanks and good luck!

Hubert



From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 14 December 2008



WOE (what on earth) gave you that impression!
I have always said I am interested! I merely asked for a lift from Euston (I am coming in from Milton Keynes ESPECIALLY for this Saturday's viewing - it's the least you can do) and now you say I can't have the flat? Please explain what it was that I said to rent it to someone else.
OK OK I was worried about the rent but that does NOT mean I can't make payments. My rental record has been very good for over 10 months now. I CAN get references IF you do not believe me. I hope you are not just ANOTHER time waster. I do not think you are as you seem fairly genuine.

If you do not want me then fine. But please give me a little more respect that just fobbing me off with a smiley.

Let me know; either way by 11.15am GMT (Greenwich Mean Time) LATEST.

Julian.


From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 15 December 2008


Hubs

Re this weekend. Do you want me to bring all my stuff to move in or is this just a viewing? Only I have been offered use of my ex-band's van for Saturday and it seems a shame not to take them up on it! Also, it means you no longer have to come to Euston to pick me up! I'm looking for a new band in London, so do you think your neighbours would mind the occasional band practice (your spare room/study would be PERFECT LOL!!!!) - we promise not to bring TOO many groupies home!!!!!! LMAO!!!! (laughing my ass off).

Anyway - really looking forward to it. Are there any good pubs nearby? Is Hampstead Heath as full of gays as they say??!!! I am NOT gay but Spencer (bezzie) is often accused of being that way inclined. I have NO problem with gays BTW (by the way) just not in my band please!!!!!!!!

PS - you missed yesterday's deadline. I guess the language barrier may have got in the way! Without wanting to put pressure on you, the guys REALLY need to know about the van today.

Please let me know; either way,

JM


From: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: Re: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 15 December 2008


Hi Julian,

Sorry the flat is going to another person. I also know the house is 'quiet' and the neighbours (family) would not permit band practice.

Sorry it didn't work out. Though wish you the best of luck.

All the best.

Hubert


From: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
To: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
Subject: RE: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 15 December 2008


LOL!!!!

I LOVE the Dutch sense of humour!!!

Let's get serious for a moment, though. We will be setting off V (very) EARLY so as to avoid the traffic and our
ETA (estimated time of arrival) is 6am.

Will you be up?

I would say "leave the door on the latch", but

A) this could be a security risk
B) I don't want to just walk in only to find you wanking on the sofa!!! lmao


Let me know; either way,

Julian


________________________________________
From: hubertvan*******@gmail.com
To: julianmeteor2@hotmail.co.uk
Subject: Re: Dartmouth Park -- Hubert: 0031 *** *** ***.
Date: 15 December 2008


I am letting you know,

The flat is gone to another person.

Good luck Julian, with your search.

All the best

Hubert




________________________________________

No sex this weekend (WTF!?) lol

This London move has NOT got off on the right foot.
I'm staying with my uncle in a north London suburb called Milton Keynes and I am NOT impressed.
It is crud. I KNOW the pavements aren't lined with gold as they say, but I expected MORE lights and stuff. I thought EVERYTHING would have an advert on like Picadilly Circus. Is Picadilly Circus a real place? I have seen it on google images but I walked for HOURS on Saturday afternoon and could NOT find it. All I saw were roundabouts. Flippin loads of them.
Coupled with this, for the FIRST time this year I got NO sex on the weekend. Not even a PASH from my Saturday night out.
I watched X Factor at home and the result SHOULD have been a sign that it was NOT going to be a good night (Hello? JLS - best Non-metal band since the Beatles... CLEARLY. Iss the British public STUPID?), put on my BEST satin shirt (red, shiny, a TOTAL magnet, as proved by its 95% wear:SEX ratio) I ended up in a nightclub called Oceana and got LOADS of odd looks for being on my own (solo SEX missions are more accepted in Plymouth, clearly).
I do NOT want to talk ANY more about the night and I HOPE my 2.50AM LTD (last throw of the dice) was not caught on CCTV. It was PLAGUED with bad luck.
Back home, every now and then I need to use LTD tactics and they NEVER fail.
The theory is that at 2.50am (if we are working to the usual 3am closure of a nightclub) EVERYONE is smashed, so you need to proposition as MANY honeys as possible to avoid the EMBARRASMENT of leaving on yur own. (At Zeroes the bouncers kick you BACK IN if you try to leave alone ROFL).
The way to do this is to eliminate those with boyfriends first - you do NOT want to be spending VALUABLE time convincing people in relationships that YOU are the better bet. It is UNethical (and more importantly it takes 11 minutes on average!!!!!! LOL) - so you go up to everyone and just enquire (POLITELY) - "Are you single?".
In fact, I've eliminated the "Are you" from that question to save even MORE time. If possible, you ALSO pinch their bum or honk a boob (with car noise if they LOOK like they have a sense of humour) at the same time.
Trouble is, for SOME reason my LTD tactics ended with me being thrown out JUST as I was about to hit the jackpot (well, at THAT size I DOUBT she would have had the gaul to turn ME down). I HATE jealous bouncers.

I have been warned that MK is NOT the heartbeat of London so I am looking to move ASAP. Anyone got a room more centrally?

Let me know; either way...