Wednesday 25 August 2010

GCSE RESULTS NIGHT!!!!



GCSE results night just has to be THE best night of the year LOL!!! Of course you CAN get in trouble for having a YOUNG taste in honeys lmao, and it HAS cost me a job in the past, but I am NOW unemployed so I do NOT care.

I went to that old favourite The Quay Club (Plymouth's BEST club for YOUNG HONEYS LOL) and I CLEANED UP LMAO
I started out playing some tit cricket, but it got a bit boring as I was out on my own, so THEN I got serious.
For those of you not too sure what to do on results night, it's a simple process, just walk round asking EVERY girl what grades she got, then when she tells you what she got, just say "OMG that's A.MAZING lol", then go for
1. Hug
2. Kiss
3. Tongues
4. (if they APPEAR drunk enough) grope

I got SIX snogs this way!!!!!
LMEEEOWWWWW!!!!
I was proper going for it cos I realise that my days of doing this are numbered. I mean, at 35 I've only REALISTICALLY got four more years of capitalising on GCSE results to get snogs. It would be a BIT sad to be doing this at 40 me thinks LOL

Friday 20 August 2010

HOT STREAK!!! Hotter than a pistlol!!!!!!! LOL


Hello friends!!!! (ok, hello Spencer and Nan lol) Sorry I've not been in touch but there is a VERY good excuse. I've grown a beard LMAO!!!!
And why, I hear you asking is that a reason for not blogging? Well, thing thing is, I look VERY different with my beard, you see. So WHEREAS this time last year the ONLY objection I got from honeys was "Oh Julian you are SO fit, but last time you said you'd call after sexed me for SIX HOURS, but you never did. It's ALMOST as if you used me" lol... now NO one recognises me and to ADD to that I have a NEW dance move. The running man is SO last year. Now, it's the 'Meteor Caterpillar' - a move ONLY I can pull off - basically it's a caterpillar with a pint glass CLAMPED in my mouth which I DOWN whilst performing the formerly out of fashion dance move.
So I am NOW going back through EVERY honey I've done in the last ten years and BELIEVE ME, there are a LOT to get through (and some are DISGUSTING pmsl)

Beard + VIP Meteor + Caterpillar = TWO pairs of shoes under my bed MOST nights!!!!!! rofl