Friday, 23 January 2009

Google Problem

BIG problem. I have NOW found out that JUST because I like to pass comment on things on the internet, it is NOW costing me jobs. Take THIS for example. APART from my fear and hatred of owls, there could not hae BEEN a more suitable applicant for the role of Zoo Educator (at a certain zoo I canNOT name) - ESPECIALLY after doctoring my CV PERFECTLY for the role crunch...a man's got to do what a MAN's got to do!!!!! rofl
Does anyone know how to delete the internet?

To: maurice.richards@*******
Date: Tue, 13 Jan 2009 09:57:35 +0000

Dear Boris,

Please find attached my CV with reference to the desperate and urgent vacancy for a Junior Zoo Keeper at your reputable establishment. I advise you to interview NO-ONE else before you interview me. I care a LOT for animals, especially homeless ones, and I am SURE I could do a fucking good job,

I wait with great anticipation for your answer,


----- Original Message -----
Julian Meteor
Sent: Monday, Jan 19, 2009 3:37 PM

Any news?

From: Maurice Richards

Sent: 20 Jan 2009 14:04:31
To: Julian Meteor (

Dear Julian,

Thank you for your application on January 13th for the education position, applications for which closed on 19th December for which we have now interviewed and appointed. (The advert will shortly be removed from our website.)

Taking advice from our HR department on your application, this was incomplete or could be more detailed in many areas of your CV and your covering letter matching personal and work/life experience/qualifications to the job role.

Furthermore, due to the vernacular language used in his letter of application, it would automatically exclude you as inappropriate language is a sackable offence within our staff code of conduct. It was also noticed by HR (as is common practice in the modern world) that a quick check on Google revealed a vast and plentiful supply of 'opinions' expressed by you across all manners of topics. It was mentioned that these don't always show you in the best light and could put potential employers off in the future.
You may like to take this on board when applying for any job vacancy for which you consider yourself suitable.
We would of course like to wish you well in your career.

Maurice Richards
Head Zoo Keeper
****** Zoo
******* *******
T** ***
Telephone: 01*** ******
Fax: 01*** ******



Gorilla Bananas said...

That's a polite way of saying that they think you're a fucking wacko.

Anonymous said...

Hell, if all prospective employers Google candidates now, you have absolutely no chance of ever finding work, anywhere.


Using your own, real name all the time was a real stroke of genius.

Anonymous said...

Your LinkedIn profile is a fucking joke.
I run my own company & I'd rather turn away business than employ you.

Good luck in your search.
You're really going to need it.

Santa Baby said...

Oooh, you were so close to landing that job I bet you could almost smell the elephant shit.

Better luck next time.
To get around the difficulties caused by your google history and improve your chances of emplyment, why don't you start applying for jobs under the name of Robert Mugabe?

Julian Meteor said...

GB - LOL!!! I've read YOUR blog!!! YOU can talk!!!!!! lmao
SantaB - Is that some kind of JOKE?

Michael from Dudley (no blog yet) said...

Julian Meteor is not a real person.
I put it to you that you are in fact a well known blogger by another name.

You are just winding everybody uo by pretending to be a real thick cunt who doesn't know his arsehole from his elbow.

I think you are either the Grumpy Old Git or Scaryduck!

Let's face it, nobody in their right mind would have a name like Julian Meteor!

Keith said...

Mick from Dudley - Now that is nasty. I think Julian can be a nice guy really, even though he is a bit weird, well, really weird at times.

If he had a good education he would realise that one doesn't use "!!!!!!!!!" at the end of a sentence. The correct way is to use "!" which is quite sufficent.

I used to have a gerbil called "Meteor", but one day next doors cat came in and ate him. Then the cat died of lead poisoning. Shame really, I loved that little gerbil.

Scaryduck said...

Michael from Dudley:

How can I put this politely? Ah yes.... The fuck I am.

oldcomrade said...

if you think Julian Meteor is weird, you should know his real name!