Monday, 1 December 2008

My MOST effective chat-up lines


Seeing as YET AGAIN I took a girl home on Saturday night (although we did NOT do it - not my fault) I thought I would share a table of ORIGINAL chat-up lines I have used this year so any BUDDING Julian Meteors (P.L.A.Y.E.R.S) out there can simply copy me (as LONG as they don't operate in MY territory lol - DEVON)
In order of effectiveness:

5. "What's yer name and where do you coom from???!!!!" lol (In a CLASSIC Cilla Black accent)
Used: 50
Success rate: 10%
4. "I love you like a sister... LET'S MAKE SPASTIC BABIES!!!!!!!!" lmao
Used: 2
Success Rate: 50% (I think the ONE failure I had misheard and just thought I called her a spastic)
3. "Do you like owls?"
Used: Hard to say. I ask EVERYONE.
Success: I have taken EVERY honey home who shares my hatred of them.
1= "What's your name, Sheila?" (in Australian accent)
Used: once (on a kiwi, oops lol)
Success: 100%
1= "Can I have your MSN addy for some cyber, or shall I just take you home for the REAL thing? Ell oh Ell!!!!"
Used 5
Success: 5 (understandable - GREAT line; VERY original)

7 comments:

Misty said...

Obviously the girls in your area don't get out much.

Julian Meteor said...

They DO. Otherwise I would NOT meet them. Silly.

Misty said...

Fair point.

Guess they just don't have much else in the way of entertainment then.

Those lines certainly wouldn't work on me.

Scaryduck said...

Misty: It's Plymouth. Every night is fight night, and the girls usually win.

Craig said...

Julian - have you considered obtaining professional help?

Julian Meteor said...

Help from a pro I would NOT refuse!!!!!!!! rofl
H.A.N.D.J.O.B.!!!!!!!!!
DEFO joke of the day (on THIS blog)

Lord Andrew of Goulding said...

I do like owls, Big Boy.